"Mommy, I want to have pink hair."
"Where did you see someone with pink hair," I gently asked my 4 year old...amused at such a silly suggestion.
"I didn't, Mommy, I saw a girl with green hair and I thought I would like to have pink hair."
After a little pressing to figure out where she saw this girl - so I could make sure she NEVER saw her again - I figured out that we drove past a teenager on the block next to our house and that was were the idea blossomed.
Unsure of what to say next, I said what any good mom would say, "You'll have to talk to your daddy about that one." (I of course figured she would forget before he ever got home from work).
But sure enough, she remembered. The minute daddy walked in the door from work she asked," Daddy, can I have pink hair?" My husband, so authoritatively said - "Go ask your mother." Fortunately, she ran off to another room. I looked at my husband and explained that she already had asked me and that I had put her off to him, figuring he would say NO!
I racked my brain for a biblical answer as I try to mold my daughter into the young woman that I wasn't. I figured that she was a little too young to understand this:
"Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight." (1 Peter 3:3-4)
And I'm not really sure that pink hair qualifies as beauty anyway. I asked my husband if it would be blasphemous to show Nicole where it says, "Thou shalt not color your hair pink..." in the Bible (she can't read, she wouldn't know the difference), but the Holy Spirit immediately reminded me of the scripture:
"Every word of God is flawless;
He is a shield to those who take refuge in him.
Do not add to his words,
or he will rebuke you and prove you a liar."
(Proverbs 30: 5-6)
I was stumped.
Later that night, I was combing her hair before bed when she mentioned to me that she wished she had curly hair like her cousin. Ah Ha! The light-bulb went off in my brain. I knew just what to say...
Mom: "Sweetie, God gave you straight hair and you should be thankful for what He has given you."
Nicole: "But I want curly hair!"
Mom: "If God wanted you to have curly hair, He would have given it to you. He made you perfect just the way you are. AND...if God wanted you to have pink hair He would have given that to you as well. But instead, He gave you beautiful blond hair and I think He likes it that way."
Nicole: "But I want pink hair!"
Mom: "Well then sweetie, maybe you should pray about it and if God wants you to have pink hair, then one day you'll wake up with pink hair."
Done. Enough said. End of conversation.
Until this evening when, out of no where, Nicole said," Daddy, I really want pink hair." My husband looked at me and said, "Leah - we have tattoo's how can we tell her No?" I gently reminded him that both of us were over the age of 18 when we got our tattoo's and that he could tell that when she is 18 she can color her hair whatever color she wants. Somehow, my message got lost in translation because the next thing I heard was...
"Nicole, when you are 14 years old...you can make your hair whatever color you want."
Yes, go back and read it again. I said 18...he said 14. Lord help me please, it's gonna be a long road with this little gal!
Lord, please help our precious daughters to see themselves in Your perfect image. To be content the way that You made them and not to be swayed by the things that the world says are important or cool. Keep them pure, modest, and help them to learn to focus on the hearts and not their appearance. Amen.